March 28, 2014
Calls to arms.

I look in my love’s eye
and see the reflection of a child
I hold her hand with my left
fear runs through the right

She dares me to be bold
threats hardly veiled
she’ll leave me as a consolation prize
or will stay and put gold to shame

I look my love in her eye
with my mind I search hers
ignorant of my reflection
only seeking this moment

Doubt is left on the shelf
increasingly, I question its place
on the shelf itself
Where love needs more and more places to call home

March 28, 2014
A parable for those who ever intend on loving

A man stands outside his lover’s home. Day and night he stays there as proof of his undying affection. After some time she looks upon him, his clothes tattered, skin filthy, and words murmured. She no longer loves him.

March 24, 2014
lovecast #2: Broken clocks work three times.

https://mrmam.bandcamp.com/track/lovecast-broken-clocks-work-three-times

March 12, 2014
Soundbites Sound Bright

  • A nigga once told my girl, “Everything after ‘but’ is bullshit”.

I would’ve went skiing, but my car flipped over and I was trapped for 5 days.

I would marry her but she stabbed my penis and I realized she’s crazy.

He would eat peanuts but he’s allergic and it only takes three to kill him.

Turtles would learn kung fu, but they already know ninjitsu.

Chickens would kill us, but it’s not in their biological constituency to do so.

Farts would come out as ice-cubes but they don’t.

It would be 1:30 in the year Bleeg-borg after the alien invasion but it’s 1:09 on a wednesday.

My mom wouldn’t be so pissed and annoying but her son dropped out of school without telling her and still asks her for money every couple of weeks.

I would have more than 100 degrees of peripheral vision but i lost my right eye when i was a kid.

Penises could fit perfectly in my butt, but i’m not gay.

I could be a breast man, but butts.

  • a nigga once told my girl ,”everything after but…yam yam yam”. He must’ve started that statement with ‘but’. Niggas have to be careful not to let their cynicism trick them into thinking they’re being intelligent. I’m guilty of it, maybe a lot of people are. We think If I can find what’s wrong with something we must be smart. It’s easier to judge an object-subject-person by their surface elements, but you have to, HAVE TO, have a healthy degree of patience and diligence to figure out a thing’s deeper elements, whether it be good or bad. Long story short, some pretty things have alotta shit under its skin and some ugly things don’t. And some ugly things are just that and some pretty things are tried and true right to their core. But the point is you have to wait sternly, even if it’s just a few extra minutes, to really know. Don’t fall for the soundbite, don’t deliver it either.

March 8, 2014
Creatures

Your actions are these little creatures you send out into the world or leave behind. You’ll come back to them or they’ll come back to you. And depending how you treated them they’ll be strong and happy enough to lift you up or angry enough to bite you in the ass.

February 27, 2014
Master and Dog Theory: Relationship Between Conscious & Body

Probably a far from obscure fact but us humans have the gift & curse of having the same biological needs and urges of the wild animal and also the miracle of conscious and conscience. I’ll say miracle for now to umbrella the utter ignorance and multitude of possibility toward the origin of this conscious. I say God, others say different. I say that is not the point of this fucking article.

The point is how do we create a harmonious balance between the two, the biological urge & the miraculous conception of awareness and conscience that may clash with these urges. First, and perhaps solely, we must understand the nature of this relationship and i believe I have come to a solid, though theoretical, sensible definition of this relationship. Butts.

We have a dog. We have a master. Now all dogs, like most creatures, come with a standard set of needs that it requires NO teaching from a master in order to pursue these needs. No dog will need to be taught how to hunt, or fuck, or sleep. Now all dogs, like many creatures, come with a natural uhhh ability to learn beyond its natural instincts and need. That’s where the master’s hand comes to play, guiding the dog to perform increasingly interesting, entertaining, and moral tasks (don’t bite this, don’t shit on that) for the award of course of a snack here, rub there. Now a dog left to its own devices will do whatever is needed to ensure its comfort and survival and if the master chooses to live with this dog, the chance is higher that the relationship will fall in the negative than with a well-trained dog. Nothing being absolute, there is also the chance of a fairly stress free relationship due to the variance in personality from creature to creature. Some are naturally amicable and some are not. But still, the lack of training leaves the probability of amicability more to chance than choice.

Now we have the body (which i’ll refer to the biology from here on). And we have the Conscious. All humans, like most creatures, also have the biological instinct for survival and only , somehow, need to survive to adulthood to employ their own will in satisfying these instincts. Then we have the Conscious ,both instinctively miraculous and nurtured and shaped, that plays the master to our biological dog. Left to its own devices our biology will go to any means (moral or not) & propose any excuse towards its survival. shit in any corner, eat off any floor. But our conscious conscience , in a perfect world shaped by a moral predecessor, guides and teaches our biology things beyond its basic needs. To read, poeticize, account, shoot a basketball. And with each lesson and reward brings itself closer to physical, spiritual, and social comfort and also a harmonious symbiosis between Conscious & Biology. Biology’s not shitting on conscious’ ideals and conscious keeps the good times coming. Now if the Conscious Master was to attempt to live with the untrained Biological Dog, the probability of a negative outcome would be higher as our Biology’s desires seems naturally opposed to our Conscious desires, at least due to our biology’s need for immediate satisfaction. And also due to the variety of personality & circumstance not every person will be naturally belligerent towards the progress of the conscious. But it’s a fact that a biology left to its own devices has a higher chance of disappointing its Conscious.

So the cycle goes this; Use your Conscious Master to train your Biological Dog and it won’t bite you in the ass. Train your biology and like a dog it will be able to do amazing things. Train your biology and reward it and like a dog it will provide you not only spiritual & physical comfort but also a window into positively understanding the major dealings of life; nurturing, loving, responsibility, feeling, observing, exercising et al. Now, neglect your Biological Dog and expect the opposite. Expect a biology consisting of desires that shit on your relationships, that thoughtlessly and greedily eats up your resources, and bites you when you least expect it.

Master-Conscious
Dog-Biology

February 17, 2014

February 12, 2014

Anonymous asked: Something about you makes me admire you like you could never understand

i appreciate your admiration. I hope my words lead to some kind of enlightenment or plain ol’ feeling. you da man.

January 24, 2014
Lady Baby Girl

Before she goes to bed she’s far from rank n’ file
But when she wakes up she the Queen of the Nile
she’s my lady

First time I met  her, I was angry she was high
same results, different method, hardly a line of jive
she’s my girl

I texted her weak from sadness, weeks too late
she hit me back at exact same cot-dayum rate
she’s my baby

1st date she felt me out, i replied in kind
my presentation was so nervous, but she dug the overall design
She’s my lady

Happy with a kiss and simply not being an ass
She’s takes it up a notch, says this feels like falling too fast
she’ my baby

The week goes by and half the days she’s in it
Don’t know if this is love, but feels like the beginning
she’s mah girl

She comes to see me sing and everyone is shocked
He didn’t have much sense, now look at what he’s got
She’s mah lady

The performance is over, but the show is just beginning
She wants to go back to the crib, for a few extra innings
She’s my girl

The cabman wants to hack off all our arms and legs
She proposes the thought, we should catch the metered cab instead
she’s my lady

We make the house a home before we sleep, and one time after
She snores loudly in my arms, we’ll have to replace the rafters
She’s my baby

Momma’s not keen on me bringing home guests
But I introduce the woman to where my heart invests
She’s my Lady.

Time for goodbyes, see ya laters, embraces and hugs
My lips don’t say much, but my eyes bleed love
She’s my lady baby girl.

Train’s pulling off and I hope for a glimpse.
For the beautiful lady who sees the prince in this chimp.

ahh yess.There goes my lady, my baby, my girl.

January 24, 2014
The Last Wolf Trap

Before I passed out I heard a voice yell
for my guests to leave
Who ordered this expulsion
too weak to send my disregard
I acquiesced

Hours later duty woke me
Its fingers were strong
enough to carry my body
my soul waved it away
still drunk on distilled sin
from the computer’s open bar

There was a genuine attempt
at the uncaring and laissez-affaire
towards recent misdeeds
but guilt, an insidious gossamer
supernovas and black-holed all feeling
faintness came

My soul screamed awake
Weak and alone it searched for a clue
elicited from the hunt
an image ghoulish and unexpected
The distorted silhouettes of my guests
lingered outside my window,”come in”
I begged

There was no response
Each plea winning only a revelatory sliver
each more disturbing
Sold to another master, they only shuffled
and briefly flashing macabrely sad faces
twisted, disappointed

Understanding came over me
with fear over the finality of my sin
But there was no shock, no surprise
While engaging my momentary pleasure with the left
I had signed away my guest with the right
Perfectly complicit

I looked their new master in the eye
My mouth said little, but my eye screamed
repentance, repentance, repentance!
It walked away knowing I knew
words meant very little, especially mine
no solace

My eye returned to the ghosts of disappointment
that were once my thoughts, now unattainable
I looked to no future, no conjecture
feeling for the first time, I had lost
myself for good, in the distance my body called
to work

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